All about my first first date in 6 years
My last first date was with Robert, who passed away almost two years ago. This is an excerpt from a note I wrote to a friend who wanted to know how my date went.
It was with my son's ex-boss from an internship he had last summer. We met in October and he's been calling and emailing me ever since, on and off, but the number and intensity of his calls have increased over the last few weeks (I got 10 emails from him yesterday alone at one of my accounts, so just double that for my two active work and personal accounts and that is 20!) . I finally agreed to meet him today for lunch and I just thank God it was in the middle of the day at a very busy restaurant and I drove my own car.
I had called all my girlfriends and we compiled a list of questions I wanted to ask him because he had somehow avoided talking about his personal life, but 20 minutes into the date, I decided I didn't like him enough to care to know the answers. I was bored to death the first hour (he told me all about the different ways we can use household vinegar to clean the house and fruit, and destroy bacteria on our bodies). But here's a clue to his personal life: he over-ordered the food (it was dimsum), and told me it was all for me to take home. When I demurred, he insisted. When I insisted right back that there was only one of me at home and I was still living off of the leftovers from last week when I took my dad to dinner twice, he said, well, it's kind of awkward because I am living with a roommate temporarily (believe me, he DOES NOT look like the roommate type!) because I am in the process of getting a divorce. I let that concept roll around in my head for a bit and decided to let it pass, because after all, I really had no intention of ever seeing him again. In other words, the creep is MARRIED!!!!
When he finally went to pay the check, he must have taken a viagra or something because when he came back, I could tell he was incredibly turned on. He wanted me to pull my chair closer to him. I declined. He wanted to hold my hand. I asked why, and after he asked again, I stuck my hand out in a give me five fashion (as opposed to putting my hand in his like a sweet little thing). He rubbed the palm of my hand for a bit, then when I asked him he was going to read my palm, he stopped.
Then he started complimenting my shoes and saying my shoes were sexy (which they are!) and I had good taste in shoes. Whatever! All of a sudden, he extended his legs under the table and started rubbing his legs against mine. I must have jumped about 5 feet up in the air. I said what are you DOING? I do not even know what he said or how else I responded, I was so shocked. He sat back and said, oh Joy, you are so shy and you are making me so shy, too! (WTF??? Him? Shy?) Then he looked at me again and said in what he must have thought was a sexy voice: (think sexy growl): let's get out of here....let's go for a walk....I was so afraid he was going to drag me to a hotel and rape me!
I straightened up in my chair and in my best little girl's voice I said, I really have to study today. I have a paper due on Wednesday (I don't, but WHATEVER!) and have to download articles (my best friend Robin thought that was the weakest excuse ever!, on the level of I have to wash my hair). He looked at my sincere looking face and said, okay, let me walk you to your car. So we walked, and he let me walk a little ahead of him and I knew he was checking out my big fat butt and my short fat legs and then he started trying again to talk me into going for a walk with him. I started getting nervous because I saw that with the way my car was parked against a wall, he could block off any escape for me and essentially, do whatever he wanted. We got to my car and instead of walking towards my car door, I turned and stuck my hand out and said thank you for the lunch, I had a great time. I leaned in to do one of those cheek to cheek kisses, and we did, then he grabbed my neck and pulled me even closer and tried to kiss me on the lips. YUUUUUCK, I stuck my hand in front of his face and said in a very firm voice: NO! (just like those date rape psa ads...just say no!). I turned my cheek and let him kiss my other cheek. I got in my car and prayed that I wouldn't see him again. However, when I turned out of the parking lot, he was waiting on the street. He motioned for me to stop, so I did and he leaned into my window and said, when you email something to me, be careful, because it is a public server and everyone can read what comes in. AS IF!!!!!!! Oh my God, the man was delusional! So I said okay, will do, bye. And drove like a bat out of hell.
So I drove all the way to the Valley to give the mountain of food he made me take home with me to my nephew because I did not want any memories of this horrible afternoon. While driving there, I was telling my best friend Robin about the lunch, and he called me. I said, Robin, he's on the other line! What do I do???? She said, answer him, find out what he wants, and call me right back!!!!! I took the call and he said that I made him so shy (OH. MY. GOD. The man does not have a shy cell in his fucking body!) that he forgot to give me two presents he had bought for me, and he wanted to get together so he could give it to me personally. I said oh, no you don't have to......he insisted, so to get off the phone, I said all right. Now, if I EVER, and I mean EVER, say I am going to meet this guy again, I want you to tie me to a tree and sit on me until the feeling passes or the people from UCLA's NPI come and get me and put me in for a 72 hour lockup. PROMISE ME THIS!!!!!
There is so much more...but these are the highlights (or lowlights, as the case may be). I can't stop thinking about what happened and after I post this am going to take a nice hot shower and scrub down. I feel filthy, although nothing physical happened. I also feel incredibly grossed out. He was just soooo disrespectful!
It was with my son's ex-boss from an internship he had last summer. We met in October and he's been calling and emailing me ever since, on and off, but the number and intensity of his calls have increased over the last few weeks (I got 10 emails from him yesterday alone at one of my accounts, so just double that for my two active work and personal accounts and that is 20!) . I finally agreed to meet him today for lunch and I just thank God it was in the middle of the day at a very busy restaurant and I drove my own car.
I had called all my girlfriends and we compiled a list of questions I wanted to ask him because he had somehow avoided talking about his personal life, but 20 minutes into the date, I decided I didn't like him enough to care to know the answers. I was bored to death the first hour (he told me all about the different ways we can use household vinegar to clean the house and fruit, and destroy bacteria on our bodies). But here's a clue to his personal life: he over-ordered the food (it was dimsum), and told me it was all for me to take home. When I demurred, he insisted. When I insisted right back that there was only one of me at home and I was still living off of the leftovers from last week when I took my dad to dinner twice, he said, well, it's kind of awkward because I am living with a roommate temporarily (believe me, he DOES NOT look like the roommate type!) because I am in the process of getting a divorce. I let that concept roll around in my head for a bit and decided to let it pass, because after all, I really had no intention of ever seeing him again. In other words, the creep is MARRIED!!!!
When he finally went to pay the check, he must have taken a viagra or something because when he came back, I could tell he was incredibly turned on. He wanted me to pull my chair closer to him. I declined. He wanted to hold my hand. I asked why, and after he asked again, I stuck my hand out in a give me five fashion (as opposed to putting my hand in his like a sweet little thing). He rubbed the palm of my hand for a bit, then when I asked him he was going to read my palm, he stopped.
Then he started complimenting my shoes and saying my shoes were sexy (which they are!) and I had good taste in shoes. Whatever! All of a sudden, he extended his legs under the table and started rubbing his legs against mine. I must have jumped about 5 feet up in the air. I said what are you DOING? I do not even know what he said or how else I responded, I was so shocked. He sat back and said, oh Joy, you are so shy and you are making me so shy, too! (WTF??? Him? Shy?) Then he looked at me again and said in what he must have thought was a sexy voice: (think sexy growl): let's get out of here....let's go for a walk....I was so afraid he was going to drag me to a hotel and rape me!
I straightened up in my chair and in my best little girl's voice I said, I really have to study today. I have a paper due on Wednesday (I don't, but WHATEVER!) and have to download articles (my best friend Robin thought that was the weakest excuse ever!, on the level of I have to wash my hair). He looked at my sincere looking face and said, okay, let me walk you to your car. So we walked, and he let me walk a little ahead of him and I knew he was checking out my big fat butt and my short fat legs and then he started trying again to talk me into going for a walk with him. I started getting nervous because I saw that with the way my car was parked against a wall, he could block off any escape for me and essentially, do whatever he wanted. We got to my car and instead of walking towards my car door, I turned and stuck my hand out and said thank you for the lunch, I had a great time. I leaned in to do one of those cheek to cheek kisses, and we did, then he grabbed my neck and pulled me even closer and tried to kiss me on the lips. YUUUUUCK, I stuck my hand in front of his face and said in a very firm voice: NO! (just like those date rape psa ads...just say no!). I turned my cheek and let him kiss my other cheek. I got in my car and prayed that I wouldn't see him again. However, when I turned out of the parking lot, he was waiting on the street. He motioned for me to stop, so I did and he leaned into my window and said, when you email something to me, be careful, because it is a public server and everyone can read what comes in. AS IF!!!!!!! Oh my God, the man was delusional! So I said okay, will do, bye. And drove like a bat out of hell.
So I drove all the way to the Valley to give the mountain of food he made me take home with me to my nephew because I did not want any memories of this horrible afternoon. While driving there, I was telling my best friend Robin about the lunch, and he called me. I said, Robin, he's on the other line! What do I do???? She said, answer him, find out what he wants, and call me right back!!!!! I took the call and he said that I made him so shy (OH. MY. GOD. The man does not have a shy cell in his fucking body!) that he forgot to give me two presents he had bought for me, and he wanted to get together so he could give it to me personally. I said oh, no you don't have to......he insisted, so to get off the phone, I said all right. Now, if I EVER, and I mean EVER, say I am going to meet this guy again, I want you to tie me to a tree and sit on me until the feeling passes or the people from UCLA's NPI come and get me and put me in for a 72 hour lockup. PROMISE ME THIS!!!!!
There is so much more...but these are the highlights (or lowlights, as the case may be). I can't stop thinking about what happened and after I post this am going to take a nice hot shower and scrub down. I feel filthy, although nothing physical happened. I also feel incredibly grossed out. He was just soooo disrespectful!
posted by knutty4knitting @ 8:24 PM
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